When someone we love is struggling, our instinct is to fix it. But mental health crises don't work that way — and sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is simply show up.
Here's how to do that well.
1. Listen Without Trying to Fix
The most valuable thing you can offer is your presence. Resist the urge to offer solutions, minimise their feelings, or compare their experience to others. Instead, ask open questions: "How are you feeling right now?" "What do you need from me?"
Sometimes being heard is the beginning of healing.
2. Take It Seriously
Never dismiss what someone shares with you, even if it seems small. Phrases like "you'll be fine" or "others have it worse" — however well-intentioned — can make someone feel more alone. Validate their experience: "That sounds really hard. I'm glad you told me."
3. Know the Warning Signs
It's important to recognise when someone may need urgent help:
- Talking about feeling hopeless or like a burden
- Withdrawing completely from people and activities
- Giving away possessions
- Expressing thoughts of self-harm or suicide
If you're concerned someone is in immediate danger, call 999 or take them to A&E. For non-emergency crisis support, Samaritans are available 24/7 on 116 123.
4. Encourage Professional Support — Gently
You can't be someone's therapist, and you shouldn't have to be. Encourage them to seek professional support, but do it gently and without pressure. Offer to help them find services, sit with them while they make a call, or even come with them to a first appointment.
At KGC Foundation, all our services are completely free. If you know someone who needs support, you're welcome to reach out on their behalf.
5. Look After Yourself Too
Supporting someone through a crisis is emotionally demanding. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Make sure you have your own support in place — whether that's a trusted friend, a counsellor, or simply time to rest and recover.
You Don't Have to Figure This Out Alone
Whether it's you or someone you love who is struggling, KGC Foundation is here. Reach out — we'll help you find the right path forward, together.
— Rikky, Founder, KGC Foundation